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Sunday Message · Fountain of Grace International · Pretoria North

Stop Letting People Treat You Like a Doormat

The people draining you are only there because you keep allowing it. Jesus didn't ask permission before clearing the temple, and neither should you.

Pastor Ricardo Zaal · Fountain of Grace International, Pretoria North

You're stuck tolerating disrespect because confrontation feels harder than suffering

Prefer reading? The full sermon notes are below.

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This message is for you if:

  • You stay silent when someone disrespects you to keep the peace
  • You let work colleagues steal credit for your ideas without speaking up
  • You keep accepting verbal abuse from someone you love
  • You know something is wrong but do nothing to stop it

Silence Gives Permission

You have been tolerating something that is quietly destroying you. Maybe it is verbal abuse from a partner. Maybe it is a coworker stealing credit for your work in every meeting while you stay quiet to avoid conflict. Maybe it is a family member who disrespects you regularly and you have made peace with it because confrontation feels worse than enduring it. The problem is that the thing you should have dealt with years ago is still there, still costing you, still corrupting who you are.

When something is quietly destroying you, your silence does not keep the peace. Your silence gives it permission to stay and grow. Pastor Ricardo Zaal teaches from Matthew 21:12-13 that Jesus did not pray about the money changers in the temple or form a committee to discuss the problem. He flipped the tables. He took action because his Father's house was being defiled. Some things require confrontation, not patience. Some things require you to blow out the match before it burns you or spreads the fire elsewhere.

You Are the Temple of God

The central reality that changes everything is this: your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. First Corinthians 6:19 says, 'Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own.' You are not a doormat. You are not a place where people get to set up shop and charge rent for their disrespect. You are the holy of holies. You are the apple of God's eye. When someone pokes God's eye, they touch God himself.

Yet you allow people to trample on you as if you are nothing. You let your partner make you feel useless through constant criticism. You let your workplace walk over your contributions. You let someone verbally abuse you and call it love. Every time you tolerate this, you give them a seat in your house. You give them a place in your heart. And the longer they sit there, the more they corrupt what was meant to be pure.

The Match Parable: Act Before It Spreads

Think of a lit match in your hand. You know it will burn you. But you hold it anyway, either burning your own finger or throwing it onto something else that catches fire. The better choice is to blow it out while it is still small, before the damage spreads. This is how you must treat harmful behavior. David Gunn took over the New York subway system in 1984 when trains were covered in graffiti. For years, the city tolerated it as normal. It became part of the culture. But Gunn made one rule: if a train got graffiti, it was cleaned the same day or the train did not move. Within five years, the graffiti was gone. One man stopped putting up with it, and an entire system changed. The thing millions of people accepted as permanent vanished.

What you tolerate, you keep. The day you take action, it starts to leave. You do not have to wait until you feel ready. You do not have to wait until confrontation feels comfortable. You blow out the match now, before it burns down your house. Before it burns down your heart. Before the person corrupting you becomes so established in your life that removing them feels impossible.

A Pure Heart Sees God

Matthew 5:8 declares, 'Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.' When your heart is corrupted by someone else's abuse, you cannot see God clearly. You cannot hear his voice. You wonder why others talk about conversations with God and you have none. You wonder why you feel so far from him. The answer is not that God moved away. Your heart has been defiled by unforgiveness, by tolerating disrespect, by accepting lies about your own worth. The verbal abuse, the constant criticism, the disrespect, they all accumulate like dirt on a mirror until you cannot see God's face anymore.

Stop allowing people to dirty your heart. Stop tolerating the things that corrupt your spirit and block your view of God. When you release unforgiveness and stop accepting disrespect, your heart opens. It brightens. People can see the glow on you again. Your whole body changes because your heart is no longer weighed down by the damage someone else was doing. This is not about being mean or cold. This is about protecting what is holy, what is yours, what belongs to God.

The Cost of Keeping Peace by Staying Silent

You have been sitting in meetings where colleagues take credit for your work and you say nothing to preserve the peace. You have been in relationships where someone makes you feel worthless and you believe confronting them would be worse. You have been in families where disrespect is normal and you accepted it as the cost of staying connected. The world tells you not to make a scene. Do not rock the boat. Keep the peace. But keeping the peace this way is not kindness. It is complicity. It is slowly allowing your own life to deteriorate while someone else profits from your silence.

Gender-based violence is not just a black eye. It is someone telling you that you are useless, that you cannot provide, that you are inadequate. It is being made to feel like a scrap cloth used to wipe the floor. But here is what Pastor Ricardo Zaal told his own wife: if he ever struck her once, she should take him to jail. Do not allow it to happen a second time. Because the moment you allow something once, you have given permission for it to happen forever. The person learns they can get away with it. The behavior becomes your new normal. The seed takes root and spreads.

When Your Heart Closes, You Close Off God

When you hold onto unforgiveness toward someone who hurt you, the pain stays locked in your own chest. It does not hurt them. It poisons you. Pastor Ricardo Zaal carried unforgiveness toward the people he had hurt in his past for years, even though they did not remember the wrongs. The unforgiveness was not their burden. It was his. The moment he let it go, his heart opened. He could finally see God. He could finally hear him. He could finally experience the grace that was always there but blocked by the dirt in his own heart.

When you tolerate verbal abuse, when you accept disrespect, when you do not speak up for yourself, you pile dirt on your heart every single day. You become a person whose face shows poverty not because of circumstances but because of what someone else has done to you and you allowed to stay. People can see it. Your glow fades. Your speech changes from praise to moaning. Your shoulders curve inward. The Holy Spirit is still there, but your own defiled heart keeps you from seeing him. Stop tolerating it. Your purity of heart depends on it. Your ability to see and hear God depends on it.

"Stop giving them your heart, because the more you tolerate them, the more they corrupt what was meant to be pure."

- Pastor Ricardo Zaal

Key Takeaways

  1. Your Body Is God's Temple, Not a Trading Post When Jesus entered the temple in Matthew 21:12-13 and saw people buying and selling, he did not politely ask them to leave. He overturned the tables and cast them out. His Father's house was meant for prayer, not profit. You are the temple of the Holy Ghost. Your body, your time, your emotional energy, your dignity are not for sale. When you allow someone to disrespect you, you are letting them trade in a holy place. You are letting them sell your soul. Stop. The moment you recognize what does not belong in your life, you have the right and the duty to remove it. Not someday. Now.
  2. Small Seeds Grow Into Uncontrollable Fires The graffiti on New York trains seemed normal after years. Everyone stepped around it like furniture. It took one man refusing to tolerate it to change an entire system in five years. What you permit, you preserve. The small disrespect you accept today becomes the deep wound you cannot recover from tomorrow. Do not wait for the match to burn you. Do not wait for it to spread to someone else. Blow it out now while it is small. The longer you tolerate dysfunction, the more it integrates into who you are. It stops being something that happens to you and becomes something you become. You cannot afford to wait.
  3. A Pure Heart Is The Only Mirror That Sees God Matthew 5:8 promises that the pure of heart will see God. When someone corrupts your heart through abuse or disrespect, they block your ability to see him. You cannot hear his voice. You cannot feel his presence. You cannot access the grace meant for you. Unforgiveness keeps the wound open. Tolerating disrespect keeps the dirt in your heart. The solution is not just to leave the person or confront the behavior, though that is part of it. The solution is to purify your heart by refusing to let them stay. By refusing to let the poison remain. When you protect your heart and reclaim your space, God becomes visible to you again. Your glow returns. Your voice changes. You become whole because nothing is blocking the view anymore.

If you are in or around Pretoria or Johannesburg, come and join us on a Sunday - these messages are preached live every week at Fountain of Grace International, 323 B Danie Theron Street, Pretoria North.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does confrontation mean I am not being kind or loving

No. Kindness is not the same as tolerating harm. When you stay silent about disrespect, you are not being kind, you are being complicit. You are giving permission for the behavior to continue and spread. Jesus was not unkind when he cleared the temple. He was protecting what was holy. You protect what is holy in your life by speaking up and taking action. Real love sometimes requires hard words and firm boundaries. It never requires you to destroy yourself to keep someone else comfortable.

What if confronting someone makes things worse

Things may feel worse in the short term because you are disrupting a pattern. But staying silent makes things worse in the long term. The problem metastasizes. It becomes part of your identity. It corrupts your heart. It blocks you from seeing God. You cannot see clearly whether confrontation will make things worse until you try it. But you can be certain that silence will make things worse. If someone's response to healthy boundaries is to escalate abuse, that tells you everything you need to know about who they are. Your safety comes first. If you are in danger, seek help from people trained to protect you. But do not confuse danger with discomfort. Do not confuse fear of conflict with actual danger.

How do I know if something is worth confronting or if I should just let it go

Ask yourself: Is this slowly destroying me? Is this corrupting my heart? Is this blocking me from seeing God and experiencing his presence? Is this something the person does repeatedly, knowing it hurts me? If the answer is yes to any of these, it is worth confronting. You are the temple of the Holy Spirit. Anything that defiles that temple deserves to be confronted. Start small. Do not wait for it to metastasize. Blow out the match while it is still small. Your peace and your purity are not negotiable.

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Read Full Sermon Transcript
So sometimes when we get into places where we get used and abused, or sometimes you even get to places where you feel like things are not as if they are sitting on your head. So today I want to entitle my message, Stop Putting Up With It. but I want to first explain to you somebody who would like to listen to this is a person who keeps tolerating something that is quietly destroying them and when something is quietly destroying you it's like you don't speak up and this is also for the person who lets the same disrespect the same habit, the same lie keep happening because confrontation feels harder than putting up with it. You know that person that whenever somebody tells them something, they don't want to confront the wrong way they're doing, the way they confront it. This is the person I'm speaking to. I'm speaking to the person who has made peace, actually, with something they should have thrown out years ago. I'm also speaking to somebody this morning who avoids conflict. They avoided so much that the wrong things have set up shock in their life. And they started charging rent. this is the person I'm speaking to today. Anyone who has been working around the problem instead of throwing it out, this is the person I'm speaking about. Now the problem sometimes is we tolerate. So we work around the wrong things because confronting feels worse than living with it. Confronting feels worse than living with it. So the thing we should have dealt with years ago is still there. I mean a boyfriend that keeps on telling you nonsense and you keep on eating it if I can call it that way This is the person I talking about So the thing we should have dealt with years ago because it still there it costing you So I'm talking about this person. The world says, do not make a sin. So you don't want to voice out because the world says to you, don't make a sin. So you let it go. But you hit rock bottom. While it says you must not hit rock bottom, you must not go down. This is the person I'm speaking to about. I remember when you read the Bible, Adam stood right there and tolerated the serpent lying to Eve. Adam tolerated that. It's almost like as if he was saying, I'm with you. but still I don't say anything if you read Genesis 3 verse 6 you will see what I'm saying so he put up with the thing that he should have you can almost say he put up with the edgy what is edgy match. He put up with a match while knowing that the moment this match that is already turned on, if I pour it down, it will set alight every fire around me. But he put up with it for so long that it burned him instead of him killing it. This is the person I'm talking to today. Now, I want to turn around and say to you. When we look back at all our sermons previously I would like you to see We have done some principles the principles of Jesus We actually called the whole sermon or the whole sermon series, we called it a Jesus blueprint. This is a series of a Jesus blueprint and I would like it to entitle my message today, Stop Putting Up With It. So I would like to entitle my message today, Stop Putting Up With It. Now, when you take this message from the previous messages, we ran our first principle was come closer even when you feel too far gone to be touched. That is when the leper felt like he was too dirty to go back into society. Then we went into the second one, which is show up. Do not just pay the bills. That is what our Father's Day message that we had. So some parents or some fathers and mothers, in fact, I shouldn't have said just fathers, but I've said it. But they only come to pay the bills. They don't really come and help. Then we went to principle number three. release what was never yours to carry. So some carry too much heavy things and the heavy things that we carry is loading us down and we don't actually going forward because of the baggage that we carry. Principle number four was take root to God, not the symptoms. Now what it means by this one is that some of us pray for money. I mean, some of us pray for a job to get money instead of praying for the money so that you don't have to work. But you get my point. So the root of the cause is I don't have money. That's why I'm struggling. The root of the cause is I can't work because I'm sick. Now you're praying for work, but the main cause that you can't work is that you are debarred from or medically bored from working. So instead of praying for the work you don pray for the actual problem which is you getting healed That take root And then principle number five was take the first real action before you feel ready Some of us, we went through life thinking that the next hit will make you to start your business. If I can only have money, I will start my business. If only I can get a nice clothing, then I will go to that woman and tell her I love her. but the real action is you need to take it without thinking of all those things. Then principle number six, bless the little you have and start with it. Now, what principle number six means is that even the small you have, you have to bless it to gain the more. Then principle number seven is step out and own the thing you are hiding and you will stand out. So some of the things that we do in our own personal lives is that it's hidden so much that we don't get seen. So you need to step up. And then principle number eight is pull away the secret place and get refilled or refueled. This is where we're talking about sometimes running a seven day is not necessary to run a seven day. Somewhere you need to go and rest and refuel as well. That is principle number eight. So just in a brief, Jesus went to secret places out. He went out to go and pray and refuel himself. That is the principle. Then another principle, principle number nine that we've done is press through and reach for him in the crowd. So some things you just have to step out and step in. That is principle number nine. We have done principle number 10, which is turn the feelings into action, not just the post. What we mean about that one. Some of us can go on to Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and go and say a lot of nonsense about certain things. But let's say, for argument's sake, you say to people, hey, I so much feel for this guy. He hasn't been having it nicely. So I would like to take him off from the street. So you feel it. You go on Facebook. You talk. but you don't put action behind it. That's principle number 10. Then principle number 11 is pick up a towel. The biggest people are the ones who serve. Now, this is where Jesus went to go and serve his disciples. So sometimes for you to grow higher, you need to go lower. So that is the principle number 11. So today's principle is number 12. So if you miss any of those others, they are all on our playlist on our YouTube channel, if you would like to go and see them. That's all the principles. So I said, I entitled this message, Stop Putting Up With It. Now, I would like us to turn our Bibles. I almost said I don't have my Bible. So I would like us to turn our Bibles to Matthew 21. Turn our Bibles to Matthew 21. And we're reading Matthew 21, verse 12 and 13. Now, Matthew 21, verse 12 reads as follows. And Jesus went into the temple of God and cast out all them that sold and bought in the temple and overthrew the tables of the money changers and the seeds of them that sold doves. And said unto them, It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer, but ye have made it a den of thieves. Ye have made it a den of thieves. Now, when you read on this specific scripture, we are used to the gentle Jesus, you know, the Jesus that that help people, the Jesus that move into people's life with a gentle nudge. Come Peter but here the shepherd the one that is holding the children is actually turning the people tables around and drive people out The same Jesus that said to walk on water, come. Now he says to them, go. I don't want you here. now but this was not Jesus that lost his temper it was actually a holy action he saw something that did not belong in his father's house so sometimes when you see something that doesn't belong there don't just keep quiet and just let it go This is what Jesus is teaching us here. You have been sitting in so many meetings. Every time when you sit in the meetings, every time they keep on saying it's the other one's idea. While they all know it's not their idea, it's your idea. You keep on keeping quiet to preserve the peace or to not get into a fight. And you kept quiet. And a lot of people got their promotions through the work that you have done and you have kept your peace. And that is the reason why. Today, our message. Is entitled. Stop putting up with this. Stop putting up with this. And if you're looking at this message and you speak Jesus, you would understand that Jesus, when he went out there, it was not a sign of just talking. It was an action as well. Did you see what he says? This part, he said, It is written my house shall be called the house of prayer but he have made it a den of thieves So he just he didn just speak about it Jesus went into the temple of God and cast out all of them that sold and bought. In the temple and overthrew the tables. so sometimes you have to tell them no no no it's not like this do it and if they don't want to listen you do something about it you have to do something about it sometimes we keep quiet to keep to keep the peace but our quietness is the same a mechi that you're holding in your hand, knowing it's going to burn your finger, but you're not letting go of it. And sometimes it's not letting go, but it's to stop the flame from going anywhere else. Because this is what a mechi does. The moment you take it and you know it's going to burn your hand, the moment you throw it away, what if there is straw and the whole place can be set alight? Instead of you taking the same problem and throw it on somebody else or throw it onto something else, you must rather blow it out. Let me make an example. You get hurt at work. You had a tough day at work and as you're having a tough day at work by the time you get home there's no other place to release all that pain that you went through for the whole day now you go off on your family that is why jesus not just took the the edge or the the light or the matchy and took through that side because if you would have spoken to them, they would have listened at that time. But the moment he turned his back, they would have gone ahead and sell again. So what he did is he thrown over the tables so that they don have the time to start the trading again after he left In your life there so many times you set yourself to do certain things but you just move that same problem to another side of the problem Some things you just have to confront. You don't have to tolerate it. He did not pray about the tables. He did not even start a committee and say, guys, let's get together. He flipped them. Some things require action, not patience. Some of us has been so patient that we tolerate the wrong things. That is not the same as being kind. Because we, you, you, you, you, how do you call it? You think kindness is tolerating nonsense. That is not kindness. Sometimes we love to keep up with those things because we think that we are kind. No, we are not. Now, there's a time that when you went to New York in the 80s, this was specifically 1984. Trains in New York was covered with graffiti. Do you know what the guys does? Every time when a train went to go and stop, somebody will use his expertise in art and go onto the trains and do graffiti. Levant, do you know what the graffiti is? It's probably the same as your T-shirt. Things like that they do. So it's very nice. For sometimes. But it's only nice when it's at the right place. You get my point. So it's nice when it's at the right place. So when these trains were covered with graffiti, it wasn't just inside. but it was inside and outside of the trains. So the whole city had learned to live with it. New York lived with it for many years. But it had been that way for years and everyone stepped around it like it was furniture. It's like it's a part of New York culture. then a man came and take over this his name was David Gunn funny how what his name is Gunn which is G-U-N-N it's funny that his name is Gunn because he shot the whole operation down he took over the trains and made one rule. And that rule was if a train got sprayed or got graffiti on, it was clean the same day. So, if it's not clean that same day, the train can't go out. So, here the guy comes and says, this graffiti must be taken down right now before this train can move. Now for trains to move, obviously, if a train stands still, it means that not just the railway company, but also the commuters lose out on precious time. Let me make an example on the commuters. The commuters can't get to work in time. So if more trains stop running because they are having too much graffiti on them. It means that more people will either be losing their job before coming late to work or they can't get to where they want to go because this was a, you can almost call it a South African taxi association. You can't go without. In New York, you couldn't go without the railway or you could. But I'm just saying it's a big part of the infrastructure that trains must run. And it has so much impact that if there not enough trains the traffic will become more And it a ripple effect of a lot of things getting together But this David Gunn decided if a train is full of graffiti, it's not going anywhere. So for five years, it happened like that. After the fifth year, the graffiti were gone. A thing that millions of people has accepted as a permanent structure in New York. As a permanent move in New York. It went because a man stopped putting up with it. Sorry. So a man stopped putting up with it. And that is what made this trains not to move. So it went because one man stopped putting up with it. So what you keep tolerating, you are keeping. The day you take away its seed, it starts to leave. It's almost like if you tolerate something, you give it a place in your house. You give it a place in your heart. You give it a place, like a place to sit. Like almost our parents used to say, So it means don't come and dictate me. Don't come and tell me what to do. Children is not allowed to dictate in grown-ups places. So when you give seed to them, this is the money changer that had set tables and seats. They were comfortable, established like they were belonging there. It's the same thing if you go to Joburg CBD. You would see a lot of people has literally taken over all the buildings or not all let say some of the buildings in Joburg and the city couldn do anything about it For years Marabastad was taken as a a traders, big traders place where anybody can come and trade up until somebody came and changed the setup there. if you go to Maravastad now so many buildings has been demolished we can't give a seat to things that is not making society better so whatever we put up whatever we put up with you giving it a chair to sit down it's like when you go to Ephesians 4 verse 27 Ephesians 4 verse 27 says neither give place to the devil so when you read Ephesians 4 verse 27 it says neither give place to the devil imagine now Now, Scripture also says in 2 Kings 17. Now, 2 Kings 17 verse 41 says the following. So these nations feared the Lord and served their graven images, both their children and their children's children, as did their fathers. So do they unto this day. so these nations feared the Lord and served their graven given both to their children and their children's children and did their father so they do unto this day and if I can tell you now some of the things over time grow so much stronger that you keep up with it Let me make an example. There was a time we used to stay in, in. Wonderboom street. To be precisely, we stayed in a place called Edouard Flats. Now Edouard Flats we stayed on the fourth floor And the place doesn have a lift or escalators You walk up to it. Now, one of the things that I hated about that place was, at that time, we didn't have a car. Now, because we didn't have a car, we had to go and do shopping. myself and my wife and carry these things for almost two kilometers just to do shopping. No, it's actually over two kilometers because it's about a kilometer from where we stayed. Let's call it a kilometer and a half and then a kilometer back we had to walk and walk back again. I couldn't tolerate that because of my wife was highly pregnant with Levin at that time. And going like that, carrying things with a wife that is highly pregnant, and you can't even walk with, as a pregnant woman, you can't even walk with a baby like that, and still you have to carry bags. I couldn't tolerate that I just stopped it and I asked the owner of the place we need to get a place that is closer to the shopping malls and we found a place in Roskahn Wirt Roskahn Wirt in Pretoria Nog it's in Benfell Yuen Street and if you go from Benfell Yuen Street to the Roskahn Wirt flats that we were staying in to the first shop. It's about 500 meters from there. That's that used to be where Spa was. I couldn't tolerate the fact that my wife at that time was my girlfriend had to travel so far just so that we can get something to eat. We didn't tolerate the death. We didn't give it a seed to struggle like that. We said we need to move out of this. We need to move out of this. And that is what we did. And if I can tell you today, some of the things that we went through in life, it's not because of we want to be sitting like that. It's just that you've been tolerating it for so long that you have kept up with it. You were keeping up with it so much that it becomes a part of you. It integrates into who you are. It literally integrates with who you are. And I would like to make an example with this as well. if you keep on letting people tramp on you it becomes a norm to you don't let it become a norm the bible says we are the temple of the lord do you know that it says that wait we are the temple of the Holy Spirit which is in 1 Corinthians 6 verse 19 let me read it 1 Corinthians 6 and verse 19 says the following, What? Know ye not that you, that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own. Now, if you are the temple of the Holy Spirit, why would you allow people to tramp on you? Jesus did what he had to do at the time because the place he was was a holy place You can be selling in a holy place like that You allow people to tramp on the holy of holiest because when the Holy Spirit is, you are the temple of the Holy Spirit. It does not clear the temple out of rage. He did not because it was his father's house that he did it. Because his father's house was meant for prayers. He did not want it to be cheapened by this acts that they did. Who are you that allows so many people to step on your toes and yet you allow it? You cannot allow that people should be stepping on your toes just because... No. You are the temple now. So he confronts what is in you because he is jealous over you, not against you. Jesus is jealous of you because you are a temple of the Holy Spirit. you are the temple of the Holy Spirit, you cannot allow people to stamp on you, I sometimes get so angry, when I see a woman, okay, let me not make it gender, but women and men, that allow their partners, to make them look like they are, what is a floor lap in English, like a messy cloth, a scrap that you use to scrap your floors with. Why I'm saying this? Let me make an example. People think that gender-based violence, and this is now women and men, gender-based violence is you sitting there with a blue eye. It's not just sitting there with a blue eye. is you being made as if you are a useless. Your wife is telling you no you are just a useless You can even look after me No This is what I talking about when I say you are a holy place Sometimes the season that you're going through is the season because of, at that time, things is not going up for you. Don't allow your partner to tramp on you because of a season that you are going through at that moment. Don't let your workplace tremble on you because of the season that you are going through. At that time, somebody at home was sick. So why would you want to do that? Why would you even allow them to do it? Jesus did not allow it because it was the holy temple that he is in you should not allow anybody to just do whatever they want to with you stop putting up with it stop putting up with it I am of the opinion that if you allow it once you are ready to do it forever. I told my wife if I slap you once just run away because if I can do it once I will be doing it forever because the one time I got away with it. And you know the reason why I said it to her is because of my past. My past is not a good past. I was even speaking to somebody yesterday and they were saying to me, are you sure you don't look like that type? I said to the person, look, I wasn't holy like this forever. I was at a point where my sister, Candice, came to our house and come and visit me. As she was visiting me, we were sitting on the stoop. Okay African stoop Stoop is stoop in English also Do we call it veranda Veranda Oh So we were sitting on this veranda or stoop And we were talking. And the things that we were talking about made her to say something that the moment she said it, she did this. because she knew if she would have said that to me a few years back, she would have gotten a big hiding, either a smack or a fist. And that is why when she did that, her eyes were growing this big. I could see the fear in her eyes. I could see she's shaking because she knows she's going to get beaten by me. for doing that. And she did this. It's the reason why I also said to my wife, if I do it once to you, just let it go. Take... Take me to jail. Yeah, yeah, it's a better word. Take me to jail. Go and make a case by the police. Don't allow it to happen. Because gender-based violence, when we talk about gender-based violence, we always think it's just that one word. It's alright. Hey, you're useless. Hey, you're this, you're... It's not alright to be spoken to like that. nobody can speak to you and make you feel inadequate. Nobody should speak to you and make you feel like you are useless. The moment they do that, it means that they're disrespecting you. They're disrespecting you. Because if somebody speak to you like that, it means that they can do more than just speak. I said to you, my message is entitled, stop putting up with it. So I want you to start Stop putting up with it. Stop allowing people to walk over you. And make like as if it is, ah, it's just nothing. Some make it as if it's a joke. Joke to you for allowing it. Stop putting up with it. I sometimes have a problem when I see some relationships. And I'm asking myself, how do you keep up with this relationship? That I can't keep up for two minutes with both of you going on like that. you find the guy telling the the girl in front of everybody like as if she is the worst of the worst or a guy even telling or I mean the vice versa the woman telling the guy and I'm like are you comfortable with what you are doing it's not right for some it might be right because they grew up like that they saw how their father and mother were treating each other like rubbish like garbage don't allow that don't allow somebody to make you feel inferior because you are the holy of holiest because you are the temple of the Holy Spirit don't allow the temple of the Holy Spirit to be making weak I've been on this one for far too long now but you got my point so I'm saying to you that whenever you think that certain things are just there some things you just have to confront you just have to speak up You just have to say it. You just have to be Jesus and say, this is my father house You not going to do this in my father house And don just make like the mechi Don take the mechi and as it burns just hold it like this Because it's either going to burn it or you're going to throw it and throw it onto something that will burn something else. Blow it out. Blow that fire out the moment it starts. Don't wait for that fire to burn you or burn something else. So something needs you to confront it. Don't tolerate it. Because if you take that manchi and it's lit like this and you hold it for too long, it's either going to burn you or you're going to throw it on something that will burn. It's best to blow it out. that's how your life should be before things get too far blow it out blow it out before you tolerate it because the more you tolerate it you give them your space so don't give them your space don't give them your heart let me make an example what I mean by don't give them your heart the moment you fell in love with somebody that verbally abuse you, the more you give him space in your heart to corrupt your heart. Because the more the person verbally abuse you, the more they corrupt your heart to be dirty, to have a fair heart like them. The Bible says that only those with a pure heart can see them. That's the reason why even up till today, You don't understand how can you not be seeing God in all the situations because your heart has been corrupted by the verbal abuse, by the things that the people are saying around you, by the things they are doing towards you. And that is why you can't see God. You can't. When the Holy Spirit is allowing you to to do certain things, you don't understand. But what is happening with me? Everybody's so much talking about how they had a conversation with God. and you, you don't have a conversation with God because you don't understand, why can't I hear the voice of God? Why can't I hear the voice of God? The Bible says that only the pure of heart will see God If you allow somebody to corrupt your heart it the reason why you can see God You have been tolerating it for far too long. Don't tolerate it. Because you are the temple of God. And if you are the temple of God, it allows you to speak up. because remember the Bible also called you the apple of God's eye. And if you are the apple of God's eye, if somebody touches you, they touch God himself. But allowing you to do it, allowing you, allowing them to do it, you make God smaller than who he is because you allow them to poke into his eyes, to poke into the apple of his eyes. You allow God to make, to be made a door made that you can tramp on because you're allowing it. Don't allow it. Don't ever allow it. And if there's something I can tell you about everything that you've been hearing today. It is to understand that this might sound to you like Jesus lost his temper. It might sound to you like Jesus was you, it's not shot. But the reason this happened is God did not or Jesus did not allow anybody to trade in a place of holiness. Don't let them trade with your soul. Don't let them sell your soul for something else. Because this is what they are doing. They are selling your soul to the devil with what you allow them to do. Don't allow it. Don't ever allow it. Because if you allow it, it makes you to become a person that is actually going to be worse off Because the moment your the moment your heart is corrupted you can't see God nicely I love it I love it when I when I see people go forward like when they don't get me wrong there's some things that you can look at people's face. There's something, Bishop, there's one thing I can tell you. There's a photo of Trevor Noah I saw when he was, or let's call it when he was not famous. Let's call it that way. The guy looked like a real black. He looked black. But when you go now and go and check him overseas, this guy looks like a white guy now. The color, the pigmentation changed. It's not because of he got money. No, it's because of the favor of God that went upon him that shine from within. Some people don't understand those things. the moment you move into a relationship and you start like this people can see he is no longer happy it shows in your whole body you have defiled the body of Christ you have defiled the temple of God people can see somebody who is happy the moment you walk shoulders backwards chest out and you walk they can see the glow in you I can guarantee you now even the speech change Your speech from moaning and groaning will start praising, wow, what a wonderful God we serve. He serve. The best God that I've ever had. This is the time I can really say. You have done it for me Lord. Look at the grace upon my life. That you have given me. You know that praises. Not the. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Don't allow it. Don't. Allow it. stop putting up with it stop putting up with it I sometimes have a have a thinking in my mind and say but why would you wanna keep getting hurt keep getting hurt keep getting hurt the same place yesterday than it was today huh why would you want to get hurt like that no man let us let me let me let me love it and leave it at this because there's some things that you should understand that. Satan sometimes sits there. You know what he does, Bishop? He sits there and then cross legs, like the whale of Vincent, cross legs, but sitting like this and say, something happened there. Wait, wait, wait. You will hear. It's me. But you see where I'm sitting. You will hear you. It's his own doing. But now I will get a fault. Let me, wait, wait. Just look at him. Look at that one. Then he said, cross legs. And then I said, ah, I told you, didn't I? I told you, didn't I? Check, check, check, check, check. Sometimes Satan sits and look at you, how you demolish yourself. How you throw your own tables over. How you think you are Jesus in your life but throwing it the wrong way Satan look at you and say Aha Moo moo Then you say, You know what we say? Satan had me. This time, In the meantime, Satan says, I told you, he said he will give me the blame. While he did it himself. Stop. Allowing it. because the more you allow it to happen, the more it will happen to you. Life is like a seed thrown out. The moment the seed germinate, it catch fire. I'm telling you, it run all over. The more you allow that seed to keep on falling into you, the more you become the person that you have accepted that seed to be. What is the seed that you accept? What is that seed that you keep on saying, no, it's fine, I'll just water it. The varamta. No, it's fine. He did it out of love. The varamta. No, she was just playing. she's not playing in her face you could have seen it's abusing and yet you let that seed grow I'm of the opinion that if you keep on letting it go you will sit with a time where life wouldn't be the same and then you ask yourself why have you started changing the pigment of your face. It's not because of the pigment of your face has become darker. It's your heart that makes the black show in your face. I'm not saying black is not a good color to have on your face. Don't get me wrong. I have seen up Africa beautiful black people. I not talking about that black Uh If you think I talking about the pigmentation of being black and being pink because white people are not white, they are pink. So I'm not talking about those kind of things. I'm talking about that black that you can see is poverty. You see poverty on the face. Go to a picture of Malema when he first met the ANC people or when he was at school. You can see the guy was here. Let me not talk to Julius Malema. Just now somebody thinks I'm discriminating, but I'm not discriminating. Facts. Facts. some people look ugly it's not because they are ugly it's because somebody has defiled their heart it's because your heart is so dirty you hate so much you resent so much you can't forgive so much and all that unforgiveness shows up in here and people can see. Don't allow it. Don't allow it. Because the moment you cannot forgive somebody, the hurt is not for that person. The hurt is for you. I have been telling you for how long I've been having a problem with this girlfriend of mine. And when I spoke to her and said, can you remember that those years when I was hurting you, this and that? She said, I couldn't even remember. And here I sat with the unforgiveness pain for the pain I caused her. Not just her, but all the other girlfriends as well. I was unforgiven because of I've hurt them. I couldn't forgive myself. and the moment I let it go things changed my heart opened it brightened up I could even Bishop do you know when people say is it Matthew 5 verse 6 Okay let say Matthew 5 something It says, only the pure of heart will see me. Blessed are the pure of heart. They will see me. 5 or 6. Is that the one, man? You say 5 or 6. Yeah. so yeah yeah yeah let's let's read it man let's read it i think it will be best he says blessed are they which do not hunger no wait wait wait it's not yeah yeah so okay let's yeah blessed which no hunger and thirst for righteous for they shall be filled Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are Matthew 5 verse 8 says the following Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God. For they shall see God. Now how do you see God? It's when your heart is pure. Now, how do your heart becomes pure? It's when all that unforgiveness, all that nonsense, you throw them away. People can't hear God speaking or see God in their lives because their heart being dirty. And it's not dirty because of you have put, you have drink, you have drink, Wrong things, maybe beer or what, what? No, it's not what you put into your mouth. Let me not go there. But I want you to understand two things from today's message. The number one thing is that you are the holy of holiest because you are the temple of the Holy Spirit. Amen. You are the apple of God's eye and nobody can but poke God's eye and he will do nothing. So if you are that, why would you allow people to sell your soul for nothing? don't let them sell your soul for nothing. Heavenly Father, I come to you in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, because you are God and you are the only one that knows our life from the beginning to the end, from the end to the beginning, everything in between you have known. But today I want to ask Lord Jesus that open up our hearts so that whatever is not from you, let that not fall upon us and we take it as normal. Let that not be dirtying our hearts, but let anything that is not from you be seen before it gets into our hearts. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, we pray. Amen and amen. That's
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